Consent is the map before the touch
Everything in Stillpoint sits on a simple rule: each of you can stop or change course at any time, for any reason or none, and that is respected without a single question. The rest of the playbook only works when that is true.
Consent is ongoing
It is not a one-time yes. It is renewed with every check-in and can be withdrawn at any moment.
Slower is always safe
When unsure, go slower and lighter. You can build pace back up; you can not un-send an overstep.
No test is a quota
Nothing here is required. A zone or tactic that is not for you is simply not for you - that is data, not failure.
Agree your signals out loud
Words beat guessing. Agree on these before you start so that "softer", "pause", and "stop" are shared vocabulary, and agree on a non-verbal signal too (like tapping twice or lifting a hand) for when words are hard.
“Softer”
Keep going, but gentler and slower. A good thing to say early.
“Pause”
Stop the motion, hold still or take a breath. Then decide together.
“Stop”
Everything stops immediately, no questions, no negotiation, no guilt.
Build an easy check-in rhythm
Make check-ins so frequent that they stop being a big deal - a low-key 'still good?' every few minutes.
Expect a real word, not a nod. 'Good' and 'softer' both count; silence does not.
If you are the receiving partner, name it early - long before discomfort becomes pain.
If you are the giving partner, repeat the request back ('softer, got it') so you both know it landed.
Before you start - a quick checklist
7/7Work through these together once, at a calm moment. Tick each when you have agreed it out loud.
Close the loop
End on a calm, familiar touch and a few slow breaths together - not a hard stop.
Swap two short sentences: something that felt good, and anything to adjust next time.
Say thank-you; name something specific you enjoyed about how they moved.
Revisit warmth, water, and rest; after a deep session a little quiet care goes a long way.